Dark Star (1973)

Directed by John Carpenter Starring Dan
O’Bannon

Why I Liked It – Ummmmmm…

There
is a special place for film school films that make it to the big
screen. This movie would seem to have lots to recommend it. This is
the first movie of John Carpenter, who has gone on to high visibility
and respectable career as a director. He co-wrote the script with Dan
O’Bannon, who later wrote the script for one of the greatest
science fiction movies of all time, “Aliens”. Between the two
they covered many vital roles in the movie. Carpenter was the writer,
director, producer and wrote the music for the score. O’Bannon
added lead actor, special effects and film editor to his writing
credit here. A distributor convinced them to expand the original
short film into a feature-length movie.

“Dark Star” has achieved a cult status over the
years. There’s never a way to explain why cult followings develop
for some movies and not others. So there’s a certain segment of the
movie fandom world who are now outraged with me. So be it.

This
movie stinks.

It’s supposed to be a comedy. I can’t
name a single moment of humor. It teased a wan smile out of me twice,
but that’s as far as I’ll go. The pace is awful, the effects are
early “Dr. Who” levels, and all the best ideas get no
development while the most banal receive lots of screen time. The
acting is bad, and the directing undistinguished at best. The planet
busting bombs get petulant when they are triggered  in
error twice, and begin to argue with the crew.  The
HAL 9000 leaves them in the intellectual dust.  And the only
alien life form we see is a badly painted beach ball that makes me
yearn for the ridiculous but far more intimidating sphere on “The
Prisoner”.

 It’s listed as a comedy and as a
parody of movies like “2001, A Space Odyssey”, and Steven
Spielberg’s film school project turned feature film “THX-1138”.
It lacks the intensity of the first and the storytelling of the
second. If you want to see what the film school/feature standard was
at the time watch Spielberg’s movie. While far from perfect, it
shows a more polished talent at work.

Reading the reviews
at places like IMDB, I am stunned at the love for this movie. Folks
giving it nine and ten stars, calling it one of the best science
fiction movies of all time.

No. Just no.

The
movie has one great virtue. It’s only 83 minutes long.

Rating
– * Don’t Bother