Hold My Beer of Awfulness

 Party Crashers From Outer Space!

Llamageddon (2015) – A killer llama from outer space crash lands on
Earth and begins raining havoc on a group of unsuspecting college
partiers. 

Directed by Howie Dewin (yes, that’s the credit)

Starring (?) – Louis the Llama, Dany Ambassa, Pinki Brainweis

Why I Liked (?) It – Super low budget scream fest that, just when
you think it can’t get any worse, hands you a beer of awfulness and
says “Watch THIS!”

I can’t explain the impulse. But every so often I will see the
title of an obviously awful movie, and think “Yeah, let’s watch
that!” They’re palate cleansers to keep me ready for the better
stuff that I usually chronicle here. I can appreciate the qualities
of a well-made movie, even an adequately made one, after I’ve
rolled around in the slime of true low budget, low-quality movies.
On the other hand, there is a kind of perverse enjoyment in staring
openmouthed at the utter nonsense movies like this put on display. I
can almost feel the director sensing my disbelief, and the response
of “You think THAT’S awful? Then what about THIS!!!”

This movie lacks the following things: a coherent script, a decent
director, any sense of timing or storytelling, or anybody in the cast
who can act. Pretty much everything that you would expect from even
the most basic movie is lacking here. In the middle of the movie,
for no apparent reason, the movie suddenly jumps to an animated
section. Now, they have an animated opening. I had kind of hoped
for it to be an animated movie until they went into live action. OK,
whatever. Then three quarters of the way through the movie you get
about 45 seconds in animation and then it comes back to the live
action. Why? I’ve got nothing for you there. One suggestion I’ve
read is that there were budget constraints (No, really?), and
anything they couldn’t afford (anything beyond the simplest
“effects”) was done by animation.

Basic story goes like this – teenager brother and sister are
house-sitting. Sis decides it’s party time and invites all her
friends. The alien llamas arrive with an attitude about
stereotypical, idiotic drunken teens and decide to kill them.

By halfway through this absurdity, I was in full agreement.

The only thing to recommend this movie is the astonishing level of
awfulness. You have been warned.

Rating – * No, Just No